


irusu

by JadeJem



Series: talk pretty to me [3]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng Fluff, Crack, Dorks, Dorks in Love, Embarrassment, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Half naked, Hot Mess Adrien Agreste, Hot Mess Marinette Dupain-Cheng, Idiots, Idiots in Love, Marichat, Poor kids, Unexpected Visitor, You guessed it - Freeform, losers - Freeform, prepare to cringe, they're idiots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-29
Updated: 2019-11-29
Packaged: 2021-02-17 22:53:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,671
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21601057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JadeJem/pseuds/JadeJem
Summary: irusu (n.): pretending to be out when someone knocks at your door.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, marichat - Relationship
Series: talk pretty to me [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1553512
Comments: 11
Kudos: 245





	irusu

She'd begun to keep a schedule of the days he'd decide to show up, unannounced and _uninvited_ as always. Chat Noir came to Marinette's balcony in patterns that followed a particular rhythm; as if his days were laid out in a planner, and he only had certain patches of time available on certain days. 

He and Ladybug had long agreed to patrol the city whenever they had spare moments outside of the two days they scheduled ahead of time, but it was no secret that Chat went out more than Ladybug did. On most of his nights out alone, he would end up stopping by Marinette's to say hi or hang out for a while. The company wasn't frowned upon; he was a fun presence, and she was always happy to let him in.

It was on a brisk Tuesday evening full of homework and distracted doodling while in a sports bra and running shorts that hiked up a little too high that Marinette heard the telltale sign of boots landing lightly on her roof. 

She blinked before trying to scramble to her feet. It was a sore miscalculation on her part; the wheeling desk chair lost its ground as it rammed into her foot and tipped, and she slid face-first toward the floor with a _thunk_. The towel that was knotted around her damp hair came undone when she sat up and rubbed her head. 

A knock sounded on the trapdoor above her bed, and Marinette cast around with a panicked jolt.

"Tikki!" she hissed to her kwami, who was watching a Netflix drama on Marinette's phone. "It's Tuesday, right?"

Tikki looked up and nodded. "Yep!" She spared Marinette's trapdoor a glance, a smile blooming on her face. "He broke the pattern."

Marinette cursed to herself. "He's not supposed to be here!" she whined, throwing the damp towel she'd used for her hair across the room. It landed just short of the laundry basket, and Marinette bit back the moan of despair building in her throat. 

Another knock. She was doomed!

"Quick, Tikki!" It was a _stupid_ plan, but it could work. "Hit the lights!"

Tikki sent Marinette a dubious look before floating over and turning off the lights. Marinette bit down on her fist nervously as she brought her knees up to her chest and rocked back against her desk chair. This, of course, resulted in her desk chair skidding along the length of her desk and crashing into her binder, which toppled to the floor and knocked the textbook beside it down as well. As if that wasn't bad enough, the pencil bag she'd left open dropped to the floor and scattered its contents.

The cherry on top? Her father ( _very loudly_ ) calling up: "Everything okay, Marinette?"

Marinette winced before responding with a weak but vocal: "Fine, Papa!" 

Well. That was unfortunate.

Just as Marinette was standing to put a proper shirt on before letting Chat in, the trapdoor above her bed, to her horror, clicked and flew open. Marinette had scant seconds to try and cover herself as Chat tumbled into her room with a grin. "Were you trying to pretend like you weren't here, Prin—"

It was at that moment, when Marinette jumped in surprise and embarrassment, that her feet caught on the utensils she'd spilled all over the floor. With a shriek, Marinette thrust her arms out to keep her balance, likely exposing herself _completely_ (oh, God), before upending like a sinking ship and toppling to the floor once more. 

This was it. This was how she was going to die. She'd been hoping for an epic, heroic death in battle (if she were to die so prematurely, that is), but no. It was not to be. She was doomed to live out the afterlife in burning shame as her partner lamented over her almost naked corpse. 

"Oh, Marinette!" he'd cry dramatically at her grave. "Bugaboo! I saw you naked! I was horrified but also so enchanted! How can this be?" 

And then her ghost would float down and _beat him to death because oh god he saw her almost completely naked_. 

"P-princess?"

Marinette whimpered, eyes staring blankly at the ceiling. 

"Y-you, um... where are your clothes?"

Marinette slowly sat up, burning from the roots of her hair to her shoulders. Chat was still sitting on her bed, but his face was buried in his hands. "You don't usually come on Tuesdays," she whined, collecting herself before trying to stand once more.

Chat chose that moment to peek through his hands, and Marinette hurriedly dropped to the floor again. "Chat!" she hissed. "Don't look!"

"I'm sorry!" he moaned, face thoroughly buried into his hands once more. "I thought you had put a shirt on already." 

"I'm doing that now!"

It was with shaky legs that Marinette made it to her dresser and threw on the first shirt she pulled out. To her horror, the running shorts she wore appeared even smaller on her in the mirror than she'd first given them credit for, and she spared a glance up at Chat. "K-keep your eyes covered. I'm—I'm changing pants."

Chat let out a string of incoherent noises in response.

Marinette stumbled her way into sweatpants (the ones that didn't hug her butt, thankfully) before clearing her throat (this couldn't be happening to her right now). "I-I'm, uh, decent."

"Are you sure?" Chat whimpered from behind his gloved hands.

"Positive," Marinette sighed, collapsing on her chaise and bringing a pillow up to hug to her chest. She was dying. She was well and truly dying. 

Chat shifted on her bed as a heavy silence filled the space between them. When she heard Chat descending the loft stairs to her room, Marinette grimaced and covered her face with the pillow she'd been clutching as a new heat washed over her.

This was bad. This was _very_ bad.

 _It could be worse_ , Tikki's voice said in her head. _He could know that you're Ladybug._

Ohoho... that _would_ be worse. Always a bright side, Marinette supposed.

"I know I don't normally come on Tuesdays," Chat said over her form, sounding sheepish, "but I have to talk to you about something important."

Marinette swallowed her pride and slowly lowered the pillow, knowing full-well that she still looked like a tomato.

Chat, to her surprise, looked almost _worse_ off. 

Upon making eye contact (he was standing right over her), he flushed a deeper scarlet and quickly looked away. "Um," he ventured eloquently. "So. You... you're Ladybug."

It wasn't a question.

After sitting there, staring up at Chat in horror, Marinette realized that the Earth _wasn't_ going to do her a solid and swallow her up. She waited another ten seconds before concluding that she was, indeed, trapped there and being faced by her partner who had basically seen her ass in its entirety. Not to mention more skin than even _Alya_ had seen...

_Lucky her butt._

"No," she replied dazedly, delayed by at least a minute. "Sorry." Sell it: you're not Ladybug. "Never heard of her."

**_Don't sell it that well!_ **

"I mean!" she yelped, jumping into a sitting position and nearly knocking heads with Chat. _Too close_ , her brain supplied unhelpfully as she jerked away from him. Marinette fell off her chaise and landed on the floor with a resounding _thump_ ; she was going to have _many_ bruises tomorrow. 

"Marinette?" Sabine called, worry coloring her tone. "Honey, are you alright? We keep hearing loud noises."

"I'm fine, Maman!" Marinette yelled back, so far past embarrassed that she could no longer tell if the room was hot or if it was just her.

(It was just her.)

"...You're not Ladybug?" Chat clarified, peering down at her skeptically.

Marinette made eye contact, smile guilty. "Eh, no?"

Chat muttered a couple of profanities under his breath. "Damn it, Bug," he sighed, face flushing red all over again as he scuffed the toe of his boot. "Of all the nights."

"I'm doing laundry!" Marinette defended, crossing her legs and placing her hands on her hips. "You shouldn't have come in without me telling you it was alright first!"

Now Chat's smile was guilty. "You're right, I'm sorry."

A beat passed.

"Don't you smile at me," Marinette snapped, getting to her feet so she could properly cross her arms over her chest. "If you think you're getting out of this unscathed, you are in for a _rude_ awakening." 

Chat's smile widened. "I'm gonna call you Ladybutt from now on."

" _You mangy cat!_ " Marinette howled, stomping her foot as rage roared up in her chest. "I am going to _maim you_." 

Chat paled. "Point taken."

Semi-satisfied, Marinette relaxed her posture. "Any other bombs to drop on me other than the fact that my identity has somehow been compromised?" She winced even just saying it. 

"Um... how do you feel about Adrien Agreste?"

Marinette's eye twitched. This was a sick joke.

"You—that's not... You're—! Are you...? Tell me you did not just— _ugh!_ " Marinette picked up the chaise pillow and lobbed it at Chat with everything she had. "I _hate you_ right now, you know that? Go fall off my roof before I have a panic attack." 

Chat pooched his lips. "Good? Bad? What are we thinking?"

Marinette sent him a _look_. " _Go_ , Chat."

"Roger that." He saluted her, bouncing on the balls of his feet with a hopeful smile. "So if I asked you out tomorrow...?"

Marinette was going to _murder him_. "I will chase you out myself." She hoped she wasn't blushing too brightly, but by the pleased smile Chat adopted, she had a feeling that she might have been. 

"Right." Chat bit his lip, still smiling when he made eye contact with her. "Good night, Mari."

Marinette could already feel her brain begin to malfunction, but she managed to return an exasperated smile of her own. "Good night, Chat Noir."

And he was off, leaving Marinette to pick up the remaining pieces of her composure before _shredding them_ and screaming into her pillow.


End file.
